Sometimes chaotic craziness just makes feel as though you could tear your own heart out but other times insanity can make you feel a little better. That's how Laurence was for me. He was utterly mad but his peculiar yet lovely remarks always manage to give me some kind of perspective on what really matters. Right from when I was young....not that twenty seven isn't young but 13 is a lot younger...he came out with the most hilarious comments which would kind of wash away whatever I was making myself get down about.
I was a mixed up teenager. Not troubled per se but far from perfect. I'd hold every little annoying thing inside of me until I couldn't bare it and it would take just one more of these pesky little things to drive me over the edge. Instead of screaming I'd cry. I hated people seeing me with tears on my face so I I haven't cried in public for 12 years. Now no one sees the vulnerable side of me.
I could be beating myself up for having missed the bus or wearing the wrong shoes or being caught nonplussed in the middle of a rain scattering without a brolly but then into my day would stride Laurence with those wonderfully wacky questions of his,
"Hey Caitlyn...what underwear are you wearing?"
I'd pretend to be really rather vexed by his invasive inquisition but beneath my pissed-off bravado-facade I found it hysterical. Somehow, the little giggles he provided me with were enough to give me a metaphorical slap around the face which reminded me that things weren't all that bad. Yup, Laurence was a very good friend. So, although I had seen him be serious...on occasion...I wasn't surprised when his reply reached me,
Hahahahaha! I will eat you!
mmm hmmm. Laurence the cannibal. Lovely. His comment did make me think though...why am I stressing about this so much? It's not as though it's a bad thing. Will and I always joked about getting married when we were younger and I always found myself rather attracted to him but this was different. This meant that I'd have to start being responsible. I'd really be an adult.